Lurkers

For my series of “Random insult of the week”, this could not be quite categorised as “random”. I have properly aimed on my target, and unlike Jesus whom I love (especially in Family Guy, you rock dude!) I actually do hate you God damn filthy Lurkers!

…Have I mentioned that bloggers are pretty much completely dependant on Lurkers?

*whistle*

They lurk and lurk
While you work and work
They watch and they read
As you post for your need

Your need for fresh comments,
To get you some lovin’
Come on now you lurkers,
Gimme some lovin’!

A familiar sight

At the online forums about gaming that I’m part of, there are 12 members online with none of them posting any new material. This is normal you say? It happens in chat rooms and every other online community as well?

WRONG! Well I mean it’s right, but it’s WRONG, plain WRONG!

Now that we’ve established that it’s right but actually really is WRONG, we can move on. The lurker is the person who dips his crackers to make them soft while reading a newspaper AND lurking WebPages at the same time.

It is generally assumed that because of the great multitasking skills of the lurker, “he” derives mainly from the female side. However, this goes against the fact that most women are a bunch of very loud and annoying little bitches.

Are we overlooking something than? Maybe not all women are loud annoying bitches, or maybe there are also lurkers who aren’t great at multitasking?

The simple truth… is that gay people are also good at multitasking, because they’re also partly loud and annoying, yet with a silly voice.

The conclusion

All lurkers are homosexual! That’s right, if you haven’t stopped multitask-reading this from around the third sentence, it’s time to come out of the closet and post a comment!

Note: Although often used as a term to describe gay people hiding their true nature, in this case "coming out of the closet" means “stop hiding”.